For some, signs of spring include bright colored flowers, gardening, birds chirping, blue skies, flip flops, and sunshine....
for me, this is a tell-tale sign of spring....
for me, this is a tell-tale sign of spring....
The lower decker pecker checker.Yes, spring is in the air!
Every spring this becomes a hot topic in our house.
Not every mom says, "Pick up your shoes and your cup on your way up the stairs!"
Not every mom has to pick up their son's cup to dust the dresser.
And, not every mom has to empty the jelly beans from it after removing it from their daughter's room.
Yes, one of the many things I love about baseball season.
Did you know you're not supposed to wear underwear under this? Yeah, this replaces underwear during baseball season! So your bum cheeks just hang out bare back slung up by those two little straps! (One game wearing that and we switched to jock underwear.) I just couldn't take the game serious knowing my son's bum was strung up in that sling. Did you also know that when shopping for "the cup" their sizes come in:
the hammer
the boss
the hog
MONGO
just interesting to note.
Anyway, I have been wrestling with these wretched things for the last 4 or 5 years but I think this season I have finally mastered the cup!
Let me share my ball sling history with you...
In my first experience, I put the cup in upside down. Halfway through the game Bryson came running off the field saying something's not right down under. So Lee took a lookie and apologized to the ump for my jock strap shortcomings as he readjusted the cup.
Even after getting it in the right way, my poor son still hated it. Honestly, he ran like he had a stick up his bum. So i made the executive decision that it only needed to be worn when he was out field. Each time before he went up to bat, I did the ultimate sacrifice that only a mother of sons can do and reached down into the unknown and pulled out his sweaty, ball cup, keeping it on the sidelines until he rounded his last base. (The cup was such a tight fit into his "ball sling" that he couldn't pull it out himself without completely undressing.) After he was done batting, I'd go to get his cup only to find his little sister sitting quite contently with his cup in her lap, filled with popcorn as she munched away and cheered for the boys to "score a goal!"
Now that they are plenty old enough to take care of their undercarriage situations on their own, as was made evident to me when unthinking, I grabbed my almost 12 year old's crouch as we walked out the door to make sure he had his cup in (he was less than happy about that), I relinquish my concerns and responsibilities for how and where it lies in their pants, to my sons....
So here is my ode to "the cup"
Oh nutty buddy!
You are the protector of my sons' goods
but oh how i wish you would stay where you should!
Twisting this way and that
in their underpant.
You've held their balls, popcorn and even some jelly beans,
I imagine you will get even more filled, as they reach their teens.
Your relationship is fickle as it is filled with love and hate,
in the end they are grateful, but not as much as their future mate!
Thanks to a job well done,
it can't be very fun.
For alas, it is you who ultimately holds the key
to whether or not I have any posterity.
You are the protector of my sons' goods
but oh how i wish you would stay where you should!
Twisting this way and that
in their underpant.
You've held their balls, popcorn and even some jelly beans,
I imagine you will get even more filled, as they reach their teens.
Your relationship is fickle as it is filled with love and hate,
in the end they are grateful, but not as much as their future mate!
Thanks to a job well done,
it can't be very fun.
For alas, it is you who ultimately holds the key
to whether or not I have any posterity.
