Happiness

They make my heart smile.

...and overflow with love and gratitude for each one of them!

A big thanks to Liz for capturing each of their personalities!

Sometimes they fight.

I have two boys exactly two years apart in age.

They fight.

We started with time outs, then standing nose to nose.

From there we moved on to me telling them to take it out to the trampoline and don't come back in until you've gotten in all out of your system...and no crying.

Then it was "best friend duty". If they fought they got the opportunity to be each other's best friend for one whole day. No doing anything with friends or even by yourself. Your "best friend" must accompany you in all your tasks...like a missionary companion.

The latest thing my ever so creative husband came up with was they each had to make a list of 20 things they liked about each other and then read it to one another. Every morning for the rest of the week, they must go into the other's room and read their list to them.

Carson's list to Bryson:

sometimes your nice.

you help me.

your athletic.

your fast.

your cool.

your funny.

you stick up for me.

you go to church.

your smart.

you play things with me.

you don't cuss.

you are good at volleyball.

your good at TF2. (a video game)

you are good at wii tennis.

you have good friends.

your good at making friends.

you are not fat.

you are a good example.

you are a great friend.

your my brother.

Bryson's list to Carson:

I like your humor,

your airsoft skills,

your soccer skills,

how you ask me to help you on your homework,

you helping me out.

I like your (sun) glasses,

when you play volleyball with me,

when you let me hang out with you,

when your nice to me.

I like when you don't complain,

when you let me take a turn on the wii/computer,

when you let me on your ipod,

when you ask politely,

when you laugh with me.

I like your laugh,

when you compliment me,

your trampoline tricks,

how creative you are.

I'm keeping them.

It's a good reference to have when they tell me how annoyed they are by the other.

I can just refer them to their lists.

The way you do the things you do...

I am married to a guy whom I adore...I'm pretty sure he likes me too. :)

He is as devoted of a husband as they come. He treats me with respect, kindness and patience.

He is a hard worker. He never looks for excuses, he just does. He's a doer.

He is an amazing father of four that love the pieces out of him. He is a hands-on dad. He is a patient dad.

He has high standards and a brilliant testimony.

He has three brothers, all of the same caliber. Not quite as fabulous as the brother I snagged, but pretty amazing guys, nonetheless. :)

As a mother of three boys, I am naturally curious of how he turned out to be the man he is.

I stayed up late one night, probing him like an investigative reporter, determined to find out the secret so that I might pass it down to my children.

He never had a sister, his mom was the only woman in their family. His dad always treated her like she was something out of the ordinary. They weren't allowed in the door before his mom had a chance to come inside first. Speaking to her in any form of disrespect was not tolerated. She was different. She was more delicate than the rest of them, she smelled better, and she was softer.

He learned that women are something out of the ordinary and should be treated as such.

His dad's parents were both teachers and later principals. Education was always talked about and it became clear very quickly how important a good education was to his father. He passed that conviction down to his sons.

My husband's parents raised their kids with the idea that if they wanted something, they had to work for it. From their bikes, to Christmas lights, to their education.

He got a good education and he became a hard worker.

My husband tells me his dad never parented out of emotion. He was always calm and spoke to them calmly even when they were in trouble. He says his dad was strict but never angry. And, his dad always took an interest in what interested them.

My husband learned to be a great father.

God and their religion was always important to his parents. It was weaved into their day to day life. He says, no, they weren't perfect with family prayer and scripture study but we grew up knowing it was important. And, there were some things that we knew there was just no getting around. Family night every Monday at 7:00pm and church every Sunday, even on vacations...which we hated.

I am grateful for those things because that's what helped build the strong convictions my husband has today.

Then there's me.

I don't take life too serious.

I have fun with my kids.

I make pretty good decisions. (it may take me awhile, but they're usually good ones!)

I dote on my handsome husband.

I love to cook and know the importance of eating dinner together as a family.

And, I have an undeniable testimony of who I am, where I am going, that my family can be together for eternity, and that I have a Father in Heaven who loves me.

As I thought about my husband's upbringing, I realized mine was different. Not bad or worse than his, just different.

I was raised by parents who laughed, a lot. In fact, I think that's mostly all my mom did...

I could go on forever about story after story of incidents where the last thing the situation at hand called for was laughter, but, that's what my mom always did, laugh. My mom always played with us. I think even my dad would shake his head sometimes and wonder when she was ever going to grow up. My family was definitely not a serious one, that's for sure!

My parents taught me not to take life too serious. Heavenly Father put us on this earth to have fun and to laugh and to love.

My dad is a wise man. He is good at thinking analytically and unbiased. Instead of always giving me the answers, he would help me think it through logically and come up with my own answers.

I am grateful that that rubbed off on me. Those lessons have helped me make some of the most important decisions in my life as well as the seemingly mundane ones.

I remember my dad coming home from a long day at the dairy. He would plop down on the couch and my mom would take his boots off and rub his feet. I remember being little and watching my mom put on makeup in the middle of the afternoon. I would ask where she was going and she would respond, "Nowhere. You're daddy will be home soon and I want to look good for him." My mom's mom was the queen at doting on your man. You were never to get your plate of food without first making a plate for your man and making sure he was taken care of. To this day, you will get yelled at if your man is standing around empty handed when there is food to be eaten. When you make your guy feel like he's "the man", he in turn, will treat you with love, respect and gratitude in return.

It's an inherited trait to dote on your man in my family and I love it!

Another inherited trait from both sides of my parents' family is the love of cooking. I'm grateful for a mom that loved to cook from scratch. She taught me the importance of a good home cooked meal and sitting around a table of family, sharing in those savory efforts.

Like most families, we had family prayer, scriptures, and family home evening, but were not perfect at it. But, I learned from the example of my parents how important prayer and scripture study is. I remember coming into my parents bedroom, long after we were supposed to be in bed to ask a question and finding my dad immersed in the scriptures or several occasions walking in on my mom, knelt beside her bed in prayer.

I learned where to turn for peace and answers not because my parents told me, but because they showed me through their example. I know I have a father in heaven that loves me because he hears and answers my prayers.

I am so grateful for two amazing sets of parents. This job of raising children is definitively not an easy one, but I hope that someday, despite my shortcomings, my kids can look back and find some good in the job I did as their mom.

It's official...

He's a teenager!

(thanks to my good friend Vikki for the awesome pics!)

Yikes!

And what the heck?!

(I seriously can't be old enough to have a teenager.)

Lots of firsts for our new teen this weekend.

- He got a cell phone (the last kid on the planet without one he claims)

- hosted his first co-ed party. (more parental guidance required than my 4 yr old's party might i add)

- and had a run in with the po-po. (hoping it's his last)

**********

BTW, Bryson saw the video to this sugarland song (one of my new favs) and is permanently scarred. He hates this song now and both he and his brother are totally scared of girls now.

mission accomplished. :)

Change

President Monson said in his general conference talk, Finding Joy in the Journey, "Throughout our lives, we must deal with change."
As we adapt our lifestyles to the changes that we face with our economy and our country, he encourages us to continue to find joy in the journey. As we go through this change with our families, it becomes easier and easier to distinguish what is important in life and what is not. And for this reason, I am grateful for change.
No matter what the circumstances are, I have my family. They are a constant among the change. And, no matter where we live or what we have or haven't, I will always be happy to come home to them.


A little trip down memory lane.....

In front of the Salt Lake Temple last summer.

Lounging with dad in the hammock at Nonni & Papa's cabin.

Everyone true to form at Nonni & Papa's.

Finding sea shells last fall in Mexico.

Last summer at Riggs Lake on Mt. Graham.

LOVE summertime!

Camping at the beach over fall break.

family game time on sunday afternoon.


Mater from the movie Cars says, "Ain't no need to watch where I'm goin'; I just need to know where I've been."

As long as I am prepared to the best of my abilites to handle such change, I'm going to try and not worry as much about where we are going and take comfort more in where I have been. It's a good place!

I call her mom.

The indians on the reservation just west of Safford call her "Yellow Hair". The people of Graham County now call her the County Assessor (Whoo-hoo!!) I call her mom.

She did it. She stepped out of her comfort zone and took a chance and I couldn't be more proud to call her my mom. Not because she was just elected Graham County Assessor, but because she did it. She faced her insecurities, held her head high through the thralls of an ugly race, spent endless hours campaigning, working and meeting new people and it payed off. And, it was her birthday on election day! Happy, happy!!

So call her yellow hair, call her county assessor, call her whatever she is to you, here's what she is to me, my mom.

She embodies everything I want to be.
She has more inner strength and courage than any other woman I know.
She has such a zest and zeal for life.
She has an incredibly big heart. She loves everyone.
She has taught me to laugh. Laugh hard, laugh often, and above all, laugh at yourself!

She has fun. When my mom is around, everyone has fun. She lights up a room and puts a smile on everyone's face. You just can't help but smile when you're around her.

She loves her family, her god and her country with incredible passion.

Touching Stories....

It had been a long day at school and turned into a long night of studying and homework. It was close to midnight when I heard a tapping noise coming from outside my window. I drew up the blinds, cautiously to see what it was and then almost wet my pants to see someone standing there with their face pressed to the window and nylon stockings over their head, pulled tight.
My mom. Of course, why wouldn't it be? She was up late doing laundry and found a pair of her pantyhose with a run in it. She thought, "Hmm, such a waste to just throw it away....." So she put it oh her head and snuck outside, around to my window where the light was still on.

My younger sister was a great tennis player in high school (still is) but hated people coming to watch her. She told my mom to quit coming to her matches because when she saw her in the bleachers, it made her nervous. Brooke tells about a particular match she was playing when kids started laughing and pointing to the stands. She looked over to see a woman waving frantically at her, with a paper bag over her head, two holes cutout for eyes. My mom. Her thoughts? "This way you don't have to "see me" and I can still watch you! Your choice, either way I'm going to watch."

I am so grateful for a mom who found (and continues to find) joy in the journey and lives life to the fullest!

The one that makes me go hmmmm.......

So today is Carson's birthday. My second in the birth order, the meat (according to Bryson's theory.)
Carson came into this world marching to the beat of his own little drum. What ever the norm or expected was, he did the opposite. He crawled at 4 months and was walking at 8 1/2 months. I should've known then I was in for trouble.

Any long time friend or family member has heard many a "Carson Story" and each has their favorite. Carson has a very curious personality. I've often said he has my "do anything" personality and Lee's "figure out anything and everything" personality. Together.....a lethal combination. I really don't have enough time in one day to go into depth or even mention every thing he has done, or tried, but I do know it felt like I went from age 22, when he was born, to age 52 by the time he was 3.

Carson was my one. You know that one that makes you rethink the whole idea of being a parent, and question your very capabilities of not only raising such a child, but surviving one. Even my pediatrician use to say, "If he doesn't inadvertently kill himself or anyone else by the time he's 18, I think you've got one heck of a brilliant kid on your hands." With complete faith in Dr. Nicholson, my goal became just basic survival for him and anyone around him from that point on.

When Carson was little, he had the tenacity and the perseverance of no one else I'd ever met. If he had something on his mind, no punishment, no deadbolts, restraints, "homemade" cages, nothing could stop him. We called him Houdini because he could figure out how to get out of anything.

This is how Carson's mind works. He gets a thought or an idea into his mind of something he does or does not want to do. Unless there is a logical reason as to why he should or shouldn't do it, he moves forward. He's actually a very logical person. It makes perfect sense. Why not?

When he was in first grade i got a note home from the school librarian (a note from the teacher I was use to, but the librarian?) She said she was concerned because Carson never checked any books out. When the kids come into the library, that's what is expected of them, and most are excited at the idea. Not Carson. When I asked him about it, he simply said, "Why? We have a ton of books at home. If I want to read a book, I'll read one of those."

There was the time in running club when I got a note home from the running coach that every time Carson rounded the last corner of field (the homestretch), he would somersault or hop, or cartwheel or when he would run, he'd run backwards. Again, I asked Carson about it and he said, "They said if we get tired not to stop, to walk or slow down, but not stop. I was tired of running so I somersault or cartwheel to the end." I should have known. When I first asked him about doing running club he said. "What do they do?" I said, "Run." He said, "They just run around and around the school and park?" I said, "Yeah, pretty much." To which he said, "Are they going anywhere?" Exasperated, I said, "No." To which he replied, "Then why?" Needless to say, I made him do it because Bryson was doing it and some of his friends were doing it.

Currently his teacher at school doesn't count homework into the students overall grade and, there is no real consequence if the homework isn't done except that their paper shows a zero (even though it's not calculated into the grade). After figuring this out in the first week of school, Carson never did another homework assignment for the rest of the quarter. At parent/teacher conferences the teacher was quite concerned about it. When I sat Carson down to discuss it he said, "Did you see my grades? All A's and one B. That's with doing no homework. Why should I do my homework if it doesn't affect my grades?" When I told that to the teacher she didn't know what to say. She said all the other kids do their homework because that's what is excpected of them. She said he's the only one not doing it.

You know, I spent so many years trying to force Carson to be more "main stream". Why couldn't he just move along with the "herd"? Just check out a freakin' book like everyone else! But, I'm so glad he is who he is. I wouldn't change it for anything. He asks why. I think that's a good thing. Everyone could use a little more "why" in their life.

Ironically enough, it's the very qualities that drove me to the moon when he was younger that are the ones I pray he keeps, like his thirst to know, learn and try everything. His peaked curiosity. His "i don't really care what anyone else is doing, or how they're doing it, this is how I do it." He's a leader, not a follower. His "nothing gets in my way or slows me down attitude". Carson, I hope you always keep that vivacious little spirit. And don't let anyone, including dad and I, break you of it!

Here are just a few of the reasons why I couldn't live without him:

He has such a tenderheart.
He gives the best hugs, hands down. When he hugs me, I can feel how much he loves me all the way down to my toes!
I love his laugh. (What can I say, I love to hear my kids laughing...one of the best sounds ever!)
I love how he "gets" the same things I do and we can chuckle about it on the sly.
I couldn't have said this 5 years ago, but I LOVE his curiosity!

(He once took a hoe to the side of our house, all the way down to the chicken wire just to see "what the house was made of".)

I love that he has to know "why" about everything!
He is very wise for his age.
I love how he can figure out anything and everything. (Again, something I couldn't have said a few years ago, but a quality I have come to love.)
I love, love, love his sincerity. If Carson says it, he means it.

Here's just one of my more memorable "Carson" moments:

One time I had both Carson and Bryson in the kid care at the gym while I was working out. Halfway through my workout I heard my name being paged over the intercom to please come to kid care. I walked over to find utter chaos.

Apparently, several of the kids had been taken into the gymnasium to bounce around a bunch of balls and let off extra energy. A good idea I'm sure they thought, "They're completely contained, there's no way they can get out, there's nothing in there except a couple basketball hoops and a bunch of balls, what could they hurt?" So there's all the kids, squealing in delight that they can throw and kick the balls as hard as they want. They're all doing what was assumed that they would do in a basketball court full of balls. Everyone that is except Carson. Yep, leave it to him to find the fire extinguisher hanging on the wall, just with in reach of a 2 year old on tiptoe. Carson managed to maneuver the extinguisher down, pulled the pin and found a great pleasure in coating the entire gym, children that couldn't run fast enough included, in a nice white foam.

It was about the time I got to the kid care area that I noticed the fire department pulling up. Apparently, they are the only ones that can come in and clean up fire extinguishing foam. Upon entering the kid care, i am met with kids in tears covered in white and some very confused childcare workers who still couldn't figure out how Carson managed this feat. And Carson, with the same look he always had in instances like this, which is the expression on his face in the above picture like, "What?"

Happy Birthday Carson! I love you like heck!!!

He made me a mom

Every year on my kid's birthday's I write them a letter. One more year of their life as seen through their mother's eyes. Just telling them about what they've done, who've they've become, the role they've played in our family the past year, and how much they mean to me. Now that I've started blog journaling, I thought about posting their letters here but then I decided to keep their letters just between them and me, I think it will be more meaningful that way.

However, since it is Bryson's birthday, I will write a post honoring him today! Happy 11th, dude!
(Notice I have your favorite song playing just for you, Paralyzer by Finger Eleven.)

Bryson is my firstborn. He's the one that gave me my most honored title, mom. And for that, he will always have his own special little place in my heart.

In addition to having all the stereotypical traits of an oldest child, here are just a couple of my favorite things about him:

His ability to connect with people. He makes friends so easily and has an appreciation for all their differences.
He is up for anything.
His desire to be good and make wise choices.
He has the best laugh. I love hearing him laugh!
He also has a great smile.
He has a very forgiving heart (what a gift!)
He is so laid back, just like his dad. He just goes with the flow.
All of his great thoughts and analogies!
These are just a couple "Bryson-isms" I've written down in the past few years that I thought were fitting for his birthday...

"I feel sorry for kids born in the middle of their family like Carson & Kendall. They’re like the ham & cheese and me & Camdon are like the bread, they’re just squished in the middle…..(sigh) well, at least I’m on top."

"It’s your own fault if you’re not the oldest in your family, you should have been faster and pushed your way out first. Like me, I run faster than Carson that’s why I came out first, I’m faster."

He's going to be a great philosopher someday....

Oh my gosh, I love you Bryson....Happy Birthday.